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Hell

by Body Spray

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1.
Hoagie Head 02:57
Any day in any weather, he's just unbearable. Full of shit but full of wisdom like beer for dinner and wine for dessert. He has no potential, had his best years long ago. All his good days are behind him, he's just waiting out his miserable life. He don't know how to read good, he tore his knee up a while ago. Now he's just hooked on Oxys, pills for breakfast and cigarettes for lunch. Everybody is his cousin, but no one even knows his name. He's got a big scab on his forehead, where it come from? He doesn't know. Did he even finish high school? I don't think he was that young: one day he just spawned into being - fully formed, and kind of alive. I know he isn't homeless, I think he's even got a family. But he damn sure is shirtless. Around the neighborhood he roams, he's never left here. This is his home. He's just a useless hoagie head. There's no escaping the hoagie heads.
2.
Who told you that things would get better? Like most people will tell you, they don't. And I don't know who told you that your life would improve, because I know from experience it won't. It'll take you, and it'll break you. It'll knock you down a few pegs. It'll change you, it'll make you angry, cold, dark and cynical. I don't know why you thought that most people were good, because really deep down we're not. We're all subject to the trials of life and not one of us gets out unscathed. We're not infallible, we have the same pitfalls. Are we not people too? We make mistakes, like you. We're not compassionate. We know that we bleed blue. A gang in uniform and we don't respect you. No, we don't care about you. We don't respect you and we don't care about you. We're shameful.
3.
Slower Child 04:17
Went to the bar alone, yeah I went out drinkin. I left my girl at home, I guess she didn't feel like coming. I'll tell her that you said hello the next time I see her. Yeah, of course, I mean when I get home. Of course she will be there. Except that I know that's a lie that I'm trying to put past; the truth is that I haven't seen her since the week before last. The only thing I'm seeing right now is the bottom of my glass... I shared some drinks with my boys, we raised our glasses and clinked them. I wish they would leave me alone, don't want them to see that I'm blinking back tears of a man heartbroken - behind my tough exterior. You won't hear me piss and moan, that's just not my style. Just me and whiskey and my thoughts, so just keep them coming, while I sit here and think on the times before she took off running, before I cried and I begged and I pleaded: "Don't walk out that door"... I'm stalling as long as I can - I just can't bring myself home, because I know no one's waiting for me when I walk in the door.
4.
Life leaves me wanting more; I'm different now than I was before. Deep inside me there's a hole I want to fill with smoke. That flavor is my goal, suck it down in one deep puff. That last one was so good I think I'll have one more. I took a walk down to the store and slapped my money on the counter. I need one of those boxes that's white and green. I'll take my time, you'll wait for me. I'm having a smoke, that's what I need.
5.
Muscleface 03:08
Lies, lies, lies - they pull them over our eyes. We're all blind to the truth of our unconscious mind. The sublime transcends time, put more weight on the bar! One more time lifting the weights with my arms. If I try hard I can do the same with my brain. Soon, I will. I'll lift it. Pay no mind to my failures. Let the blood flow through your veins, the air flow through your lungs, your muscles contract and your mind will expand. Lift the weights over your head, clear the thoughts from your mind and the weights will lift YOU.
6.
Fake Gun 02:14
Like an atom bomb, like a loaded gun, I'll blow you away if I have to. Like a prisoner without any chains, I'll make my escape when it suits me. Like an animal let loose from it's cage, I'll run away if I want to. Like a well-fed shark who smells fresh blood: I'll chomp you to bits when I get hungry. If I felt so inclined, I could do something great. I just don't have the time because I'm busy. I could build a wall over ten feet tall, and I'll knock it all down because I want to. I'm getting in shape and I'm feeling great, but I'll throw it away for no reason. Got no energy and I can barely sleep. It's not a problem, I just don't want to. If you don't leave me alone, then I'm going to get mad. I'm not just some bum, I demand some respect. I'm not wasting my life in this wretched machine. I won't try any harder when the stakes are so lame.
7.
Death Deed 04:05
When I die, don't bury me. When I die, don't bother. I don't need a grave, just toss me in the trash. Drag me through the streets and float me down the creek. I don't need a grave, I don't need the dirt. Chop me up into pieces and flush me down the drain. When I die, don't bury me, when I die, don't bother. I don't want a box, I don't need an urn. When I'm gone, just blow me up: nothing left of me to burn. I don't want to rest - I want to rot. Drag me deep into the forest and let the worms eat my face. I went to school, I got a job. I bring home cash but it's never enough. I have some friends but they don't like me much. I have a family, but we don't keep in touch. There are some things I don't want to know; there are places I don't want to go. I'm still alive, in spite of all I've done. I'm not afraid but I don't want to die. There's lots of things I never got to try, and I have principles I must abide. I have activities, but I never get to go. I feel my whole life spinning gently out of control.

about

All songs written and performed by Body Spray.
Recorded August 2016 at Permanent Hearing Damage by Steve Roche.

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released September 9, 2016

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all rights reserved

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about

Body Spray Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

We met in a bowling league. We rolled together and then we rocked together.

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